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“Hence it will follow, that one of the probable signs of high
breeding in men generally will be their kindness and mercifulness;
these always indicating more or less firmness of make in the
mind.”

Undoubtedly the first law of good breeding is unselfishness, that
thorough forgetfulness of one’s own wants and comforts, and
thoughtfulness for the happiness and ease of others, which is the
Christian gentleman’s rule of life; which makes him yield the easy
chair to another older and weaker than himself, and sit upon a
narrow bench, or perhaps stand up; which selects for another the
choicest portions of the dishes upon the table, and uncomplainingly
dines off what is left; which hears with smiling interest the well-
worn anecdotes of the veteran story-teller; which gently lifts the
little child, who has fallen, and comforts the sobbing grief and
terror; which never forgets to endeavor to please others, and seems,
at least, pleased with all efforts made to entertain himself. Place
the code of politeness beside that of vulgarity and see if the one
does not contain all virtue, the other vice. Is not good temper
virtuous and polite, bad temper vicious and vulgar? Is not self
denial virtuous and polite, selfishness vicious and vulgar? Is not
truth virtuous and polite, scandal vicious and vulgar? Take every
principle in the conventional code of the perfectly well-bred, and
so define it, and not a virtue is rude.

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